Insult the X-Geeks
by Pantera Kedian
Summary: Completely Pointless. The Brotherhood gather round a table to make fun of Evan. Perhaps more to follow. I'm not sure. Rating only for language.


            Disclaimer: I don't own X-Men Evolution or any of the characters within, insulter or insultee.

            Note: This is a completely pointless little fic in dialogue form about the Brotherhood making fun of Evan. Like I said in one of my other fics…Concert Night (coughs) go see it. (cough) (Yes I know. This has been another…Shameless Plug) I don't hate any of the characters. Not even Evan. Making fun of him just seemed like a thing the Brotherhood would do. And I was bored in the waiting room of the doctor's office and had my journal so…this was born. I may make this a series with the other characters as well, if I get some good reviews. I'm not sure. 

Okay, I'm rambling, so I'm just going to…stop now. Enjoy.

***

Tabby: So, how do you play this game? I've never heard of it before. 

Fred: Of course you haven't. We made it up. 

Todd: It's called "Insult the X-Geeks." The rules are really simple, yo."

Tabby: (smiles) With a name like that, I can believe it.

Todd: Right. Well, the point of the game is to think up as many insults about them as you can. Every game we choose another

          loser to pick on. Then it goes around the table, each one of us thinking up a new one. Oh, and they have to have 

          something to do with the one before. Like if Pietro says Evan has smelly feet then I might say he can't run for shit. 

          They're both feet things, y'know?

Fred: It's fun. You'd be surprised at some of the really original insults you can get in.

Tabby: All right. I'm in. So who do we start with?

Todd: Hold on. We have to wait for Pietro, yo.

Tabby: Now there's something I never thought I'd hear. 

Pietro: (zooms into room hyperly) Hear what? Huh? What? What's going on? Someone tell me what's going on! What were 

            you saying? And why are you all staring at me as if I had three heads? Huh? Out with it!

Todd: …Um…Pietro…

Pietro: What? What is it?!

Tabby: I'm just gonna put this bluntly. Are you aware that you're wearing fruit on your head?

Pietro: What?

Tabby: Fruit! On. Your. Head.

Pietro: Oh! (takes food off head) That. Right. Well, I buzzed by the supermaket on my way home and I though I'd pick us up

           some stuff, only they had this whole "Caribbean Delight" thing going on and I kinda got into it. Hey, anyone want some

           grapes? (holds out food in hand)

Todd: Dude! Not after its been on your head!

Fred: Yeah. Thanks, quickie! (takes a huge handful of grapes and disappears them)

Tabby: Okay, can we get on with this before I'm forced to lose MY lunch?

Pietro: Sure we can get on with it! Uh…what are we getting on with?

Todd: Insult the X-Geeks.

Pietro: Ooh! Let's do Evan! We have to do Evan! C'mon, PLEASE can we do Evan?

Todd: (shrugs) Don't bother me, yo. You guys cool with it?

Tabby: Sure. Why not?  
  


Fred: (eats more grapes)

Pietro: Yes!! (pulls over chair so its facing backwards to table and sits next to Todd, leaning arms against chair back)

Todd: Alright. I think Tabitha should go first 'cause she's new. Plus, it was her idea to play this game in the first place.

Pietro: Uh-hm. Go for it, Tabitha. 

(All eyes turn to her)

Tabby: (nervous) Um. Okay. Ah…heh…Evan Daniels is a loser.

Todd: No, no, no! You have to get more specific than that!

Tabby: Fine. (suddenly smirks at Todd) Evan Daniels has smelly feet.

Todd: (grins back) And he can't run for shit, either.

Pietro: Or play basketball.

Fred: It's because he's so short. He can't make the baskets.

Tabby: That, and he's just inferior.

Todd: To everybody.

Pietro: Especially the GREAT Pietro Maximoff!

Fred: Because you're just too cool for him.

Todd: Dude, don't help his ego any! It's big enough already.

Tabby: Um…can I switch gears here? 'Cause this one's pretty much dead.

Todd: Go for it.

Tabby: In that case; one day I was going through his closet and dresser…His stuff isn't as cool as yours, Pietro, by the

            way…and I found a bunch of women's underwear. He CLAIMED they were Kitty's and someone had mixed up[ the

            laundry loads, but…

Todd: Ha! Evan the cross-dresser!

Pietro: (slyly) Either that or they really were Kitty's. (raises eyebrows suggestively)

Fred: Nah. He probably stole them from his grandmother and wears them.

Tabby: Yeah, I can imagine him walking around school wearing pantyhose and lace.

Todd: (snicker) And a push-up bra.

Pietro: It kinda makes you wonder if he was always a guy.

Fred: Or whether he used to be a sheep.

Tabby: A really stupid sheep.

Todd: Named Gordon.

Pietro: Hey, wouldn't that make him the black sheep of the family?  
  


Tabby: (groans) Oh, that was a bad pun!

Lance: (walks in door) Hey, guys. (sees them all sitting around table) What are you doing?

Todd: Playing "Insult the X-Geeks"

Lance: Oh, really? Who're we on?

Tabby: Evan.

Lance: (rolls eyes) Is Pietro in the room? Of course we're doing Evan. All right. I'm in. (sits down between Fred and Tabitha) 

            What insult were we on?

Pietro: Gordon the stupid, cross-dressing sheep.

Lance: What?

Pietro: Nothing. You start one.

Lance: Okay. What about his power? How stupid is it? I mean, how useful is growing spikes unless you plan on killing

           someone every day.

Tabby: Right. And starting earthquakes is oh-so-practical.

Lance: Hey, we're making fun of Daniels here! Not me.

Todd: Yeah. We'll do you later.

Pietro: But the haircut is really stupid.

Lance: Hey!  
  


Pietro: I'm talking about Daniels!

Lance: Oh.

Fred: Yeah. I mean, does he think he's Dennis Rodman or something?

Lance: Pretty soon he's gonna have his eyelids pierced and tattoos of Mickey Rooney all over him.

Tabby: Mickey Rooney? Whatever. And, like, its so obvious that he dyes his hair. Does he think no one notices?

Todd: The bleach seeping in is probably what makes him so stupid.

Pietro: Plus he's gonna be bald by the time he's twenty-three.

Fred. And then he can shine his head to look like Mr. T!

Lance: But to do that he'd have to gain about two hundred pounds.

Tabby: Somehow I don't think that's going to be a problem. Have you seen the way he eats? He practically puts Blob to

           shame!

Todd: Now that's talent.

Pietro: The only talent he has.

Fred: Unless you call making an idiot of himself in public a talent.

Lance: (mutters) You're one to talk.

Fred: What was that?  
  


Lance: Um…I said he's as boring as an old sock!

Tabby: (winks at Lance) And he smells like one too. 

Pietro: I…

Fred: Guys, I'm hungry.

(Everyone but Tabitha groans as Fred pushes himself to his feet and heads for the kitchen. Todd pushes back from the table and Lance gets up, preparing to leave.)

Tabby: Hey, what's up? We're not stopping there, are we?

Lance: We have to.

Pietro: (also standing up. Jerks thumb at Blob's back.) Yeah. Once he gets on a snacking binge you won't get anything

           intelligent out of him. 

Tabby: Well, so what? Can't we keep going without him?

Todd: (snorts) Yeah right. We tried that once and…

Fred: Hey, does anyone know where the Doritos are?  
  


Todd: …we had trouble…

Fred: Found them! What about the pickles?

Todd: …finishing a sent…

Fred: Ooh! Whipped cream! That'll be good on top!

Todd: Oh, forget it! I'm going upstairs…

Fred: Oh and look! We still have a can of sardines left.

Todd: …yo.

Tabby: Hm. I see your point.

(Everyone vacates the area quickly. Fred comes back in carrying a massive and somewhat gross sandwich.)

Fred: All right, guys. I'm ready for Round Two! Guys?

Well, what did you think? You like? Didn't like? Want me to continue? Review please.

I said, REVIEW!!!


End file.
